Two more days

Just two more days til my "Bitter Sixteen". Nothing special. I was gonna go to Oxford for my birthday, now I'm not so sure I want to anymore . Don't ask, long story.  I was lonely last year, I guess this year shouldn't be so special as to any other way. I guess I'm just gonna have to put myself on the level I never wanted to be on...humble. I'm usually humble with a few choice people...but it's gotten me nowhere, so I'm just gonna say what the fuck and be everyone's bitch. It seems like that's the only way I'll have any friends. Life sucks...pretty hard right now. I really miss the way it was. I was excited about spending my birthday with someone I can actually love differently than I love, say...my parents. But apparently God doesn't want me to.  I can't argue with Him, so I might as well accept it. I would say "suck it up and accept it"...but I'm at the point there IS no sucking it up. I hate the lonely feeling...it wont go away, no matter how much love I get from other people. If ever John reads this, this is a note to him. "You have successfully ruined me. I can't even love anyone anymore and, yes, it's all your fault. Thank you. Merry fucking Christmas."

EDIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
New site - http://www.xanga.com/xXxShatteredxXxHopesxXx

Currently Listening Gravity By Our Lady Peace Somewhere Out There see related

Bleh.

6 Days. I'll be in Oxford all Thursday goin and watchin movies cause clearly I probably wont have a sweet 16 party.

If i was a serial killer i would be David Berkowitz. Originally believed to be a paranoid schizophrenic, David Berkowitz (the Son of Sam), claimed to be plagued by demons that came in the form of dogs, when the dogs would howl, that was their signal for him to kill. He said that the dogs would call out to him for blood and death, and their cry's would only stop by killing and assaulting over 6 New York women. In a later interview Berkowitz revealed that the demon story was a conscious fabrication that he had made up to force the police into believing he was insane if he was caught. He also confessed that he would become sexually aroused when stalking his victims and would sometimes come back to the crime scenes and masturbate while envisioning his prior killings. kill count: 6 Find what serial killer you would be, Take the Serial Killer Quiz now! .. You scored as Peter. You're a lovable but moronic idiot. And where as imbecile is a word, festeasio is not. Peter 90% Brian 85% Stewie 80% Chris 75% Meg 70% Lois 55% What Family Guy Character Are you? created with QuizFarm.com .. You scored as Emo. Your Totaly Emo! Rocker, Mosher 95% Emo 95% Skater 80% Goth 75% Chav, Townie, Rude Boy, Ned, Kev 55% Prepy 45% Trendy 35% What Group Are You? Chav, Rocker, Skater, Emo, Goth, Trendy, Prepy E.c.t created with QuizFarm.com .. You scored as Labret Piercing. You probably intimidate a whole lot of people without really meaning too. If people could just get past the many tattoos, piercings, and sideburns I'm sure they'd love you. Or still be scared, who knows. Dirty Piercings 80% Labret Piercing 80% Nipples 80% Lip Piercing 60% Cartilage Piercing 60% Belly Button Piercing 50% Tongue Piercing 40% Earlobe Piercing 40% Nose Piercing 30% What Piercing Are You? created with QuizFarm.com You scored as Being Drunk in Public. You would most likely cause commotion in public being drunk Being Drunk in Public 100% Murder 83% Public Nudity 75% Fraud 58% Theft 17% What crime would you most likely commit? created with QuizFarm.com You scored as grunge. grunge 80% metal 70% rap 55% Pop Punk 55% country 50% Pop 50% reggae 50% mainstream rock 50% Punk 45% Indie 40% industrial 35% classic rock 35% Emo 30% ska 10% what breed of music are you? created with QuizFarm.com .. You scored as Romantic Kisser. Good for you! You know how to kiss and hopefully you have a certain someone to experience a serge of happiness with. If not, it doesnt hurt to flirt kiss a little hehe. Just dont get carried away. Romantic kissing is always a plus! Kissing is an art keep it up and youll be really good! Here some tips: 1. Be ready 2. no smoking 3. start slow 4. up the intensity 5. develop rhythm 6. change it up 7. pay attention to hands 8. experiment 9. respond 10. repeat Romantic Kisser 100% Yippy Ki Yay! 69% Your more of a class act than youre giving yourself credit for 56% How good do you kiss? created with QuizFarm.com .. You scored as The Undertaker. You are the Lord of Darkness. NOTHING CAN STOP YOU! Why? Because not only are you menacing physically but mentally as well! That's hard to do! Also, the overwhelming respect you get by everyone else adds to your invulnerability! You're engulfed by Darkness no question about it. And if you want, you'll bring unlucky souls WITH YOU! When the inevitable comes, you WILL NOT REST IN PEACE! Christian 88% The Undertaker 88% Matt Hardy 88% Spike Dudley 81% Triple H 75% Chris Jericho 69% Mick Foley 69% Stone Cold 69% John Cena 69% Edge 63% JBL 56% Eugene 44% Which WWE WRESTLER are you like? V.2 created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Michael Myers. You are Michael Myers. You are quiet, and have serious family issues. You wont rest until you kill your entire family, and everyone who gets in your way. You dont really care what you kill with, but you prefer a nice butcher knife from the kitchen. There is no hope for you. There is nothing living behind your eyes but evil. Michael Myers 80% Jigsaw 80% Jason Voorhees 75% Freddy Krueger 65% Hannibal Lecter 65% Pinhead 65% Candyman 65% Captain Spaulding 50% Leatherface 50% Buffalo Bill 30% Which Horror Killer are You? created with QuizFarm.com

I'm beatin the fuckin BRAKES off Brittany and Ashley. I don't give a fuck if they see this, I want them to know. You go to see the person I love more than life itself with hopes and dreams of something coming out of it, and you've done the one major thing to me that you don't do. There's 3 things you don't fuck with, that's my money, my men, and my feelings. And they're fuckin with 2 of those and I'm gonna fuckin hurt someone. Watch your fuckin backs, the old Hannah's back and she's more pissed off than ever. Fucking whores.